Goodbye Masala

Goodbye to occurences like these:
-while receiving our lung, I was wondering why Khenpo Pema Sherab had a stuffed animal--a small white dog--on his side table. When suddenly, a mountain of pecha's fell on my head...
-after we'd banished the giant cockroach from under the bed, shooed the gecko out the door and unsuccessfully tried to stalk the mosquitoe--we went to bed
-and the dums are drumming, and the army of kettle bearers surge in (in the temple, the monks are like so many bees going about their jobs--and birds take flight)

Goodbye To
-absolute "no's"
-colored laundry on the line
-cold bucket showers
-heat and sticky backs of limbs
-a dry tap
-bougainvillea and monks everywhere
-ants marching across the wall (carrying dead insects) to the windowsill
-to carrying buckets of water across the street, up to our rooftop hospital room
-slow everything

Goodbye India

Final day of Gutor

Giant Buddha in the Golden temple here at Namdroling

Hurling and Burning the Gutor at the end of the 5 day Kilaya Puja

Gutor dances to dispel obstacles for the coming year

The procession of monks outside Zangdopalri before the final rituals of Gutor

PS these pictures posted in the reverse order

What We See

Yay for coconuts down the road...

View through K's lavender lace window (it's to keep out the mosquitoes!)

Me in an autorickshaw

Laundry with Zangdopalri in the distance

Our oh-so-colorful hospital room

Once in A Lifetime

Yesterday Jenn, Dawa Norbu (Khenchen Tsewang's Shapju) and I headed to Sera Jey Monastery trying our best to see the Dalai Lama, we had no "pass", no real hope of getting anywhere near His Holiness with the crowds of thousands that had flocked to receive His Holiness's Hayagriva empowerment. When we arrived there were already thousands and thousands of people present and a line just to enter the monastery that seemed to stretch forever. This was going to be impossible. Just the monks at Sera alone (the monastery where the empowerment was being given were more than 7,000 strong), how could we ever hope to end up in the temple (the only way to actually see the Dalai Lama)?
Dawa Norbu decided to leverage our Inji (English) complexions to our advantage and pleaded at every possible gate of the monastery to let these poor Injis into the compound as we had traveled so far to see His Holiness. It took several visits to several different gates but we finally did it. I thought that's it we are as good as sitting in front of the Dalai Lama, wrong. Inside the monastery gate we found thousands of Tibetan families camped on the grounds surrounding the main temple which remained tightly locked.
We spoke to several differnet security officials about entering the temple for the empowerement and were continually told, "no way". Only monks would be allowed in the temple and even then not all the monks would be able to fit inside. I surveyed the scene outside and it looked grim, sitting outside without seeing the Dalai Lama, with no video feed and only speakers blaring a language I barely understand was not going to suffice for receiving an empowerment.
We waited for a few hours and just before the Dalai Lama arrived the temple was opened for monks only. Dressed in our Ngakpa Regalia we attempted to enter with the monks from the east, no such luck, we again tried from the back, denied, once more from the west, success, so we thought. We made it just inside the temple and were swiftly escorted back out, asking for passes, permits, ID--everything we didn't have.
After a lot of walkie-talkie chatter we were swept into the huge temple where more than 5,000 monks were gathered. I said, I'll just sit here at the back, but security had other plans. They swept us through row after row of monks, past children, adolescents, adults, aging monks, up and up and up until we were placed in the front row no more than 30 or 40ft from the Dalai Lama's throne, the only people closer than us were high Tulku's and the Abbott of the monastery who sat on the stage at the foot of the throne.
I was in total shock and feeling really guilty for sitting where we were sitting. But I wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth, if this is my karma what can I do I thought. Dawa Norbu was giddy, he said in all his times coming to see the Dalai Lama he was never even allowed in the temple and could never have imagined sitting in the front row so close, it seemed impossible.
After some time, the Dalai Lama arrived, I wasn't sure where he would enter from, probably from back stage for security purposes. To my surprise he came in through the front doors and walked right down the middle of the huge congregation and then right in front of us, not two arm lengths away, he paused, smiled and bowed to everyone as he slowly made his way to his throne. We were in shock, and ecstatic.
The Dalai Lama began to give a talk on world religions and the preciousness of Buddhism in general and Tibetan Buddhism in particular. It quickly became clear that this was a case of water everywhere without a drop to drink, seeing as I understand about every 10th word. A monk came by and asked if we had a radio as a translation was being given in english over the radio. No such luck, I don't usually carry a radio to empowerments and if I had, security probably would have tackled me before I ever got in the temple.
A few minutes later a monk who was one of the chief translators came and sat with us, directly on my right side and began translating everything word for word right into my right ear. This was unbelievable, we had made it in against all odds, we were sitting in the front row, we were only feet away from the Dalai Lama and now I had a personal running translation. I just tried to be grateful for whatever merit I had accrued to find myself in this situation and dedicate it to the happiness of all sentient beings.
The Dalai Lama gave a general Dharma talk eloquently and extensively covering the entire path and all nine yanas, pausing for appropriate meditations at each stage, such as Bodhicitta and Emptiness meditations, he explained the progession of views all the way up to the highest Dzogchen Atiyoga view and meditation of the union of Awareness and Emptiness.
He then explained that the empowerment we would be given would be a Nyingma pure vision terma, revealed directly by Guru Rinpoche to the Great 5th Dalai Lama. What?? A Nyingma empowerment from the head of the Gelugpa tradition, this seemed tailored just for us, probably the only three Nyingmapas sitting in the temple. His Holiness gave an extensive empowerment, the Vase containing: bumpa, crown, vajra, bell, name. The Secret, the Wisdom and the Word empowerment, complete with clear and direct pointing out instructions.
He explained everything every step of the way so that all vows, Pratimoksha, Bodhisattva, and Samaya were understood and taken by those wishing to truly receive the empowerment and not by those who wished only for a blessing, each ritual was explained and the profound meaning of highest yoga tantra and specificially Dzogchen was elucidated. We spent more than 5 hrs there receiving these teachings, engaging in meditation together and receiving the empowerment.
It truly was a once in a lifetime experience, we have seen the Dalai Lama before, several times, but to receive such clear and profound instructions on our very own Nyingma tradition, from teachings he himself received from Dilgo Khyentse and Dudjom Rinpoche, the rarity of it is inexpressible.

Reasons

the reason why I'll be back in America in a few days is not because I can't stand another second of India--not because trying to get things done here is like swimming upstream, or because we never have any water--but because my mom has breast cancer and is having surgery soon. so all my peeps, please say a prayer for her....thanks

Namdroling

The pre-pubescent monks next door are constantly sweeping and mopping their room, cooking and doing laundry...They're like little super housewives in their shorts and undershirts. They now smile at me after my peace offering of coconut cookies and un-named biscuits which i heard them squealing over from my room. Bee carcasses litter the ground (in Zangdopalri). The leper's stubbed hands have fingernails (I saw as I placed a rupee in them). Fat rats near the stupa--dusk. Lolling on the sidewalk. White fog this morning, the birds elated. In the afternoon they tell me there's no tea.

Right Now I Am

Enjoying...South Indian veg meals at Shanti. Fig and honey ice cream at Caravan. My kaleidoscopic-colored refuge of a room in the hospital.
Wondering...When my mom's surgery will be and thus, when am I heading home? Why I am incessantly dreaming at night. And why all these filthy hag dreams?
Marveling...At how hot our room gets in the middle of the night whenthe power goes off and the fan stops spinning. At how just when I think I'm impervious to stares, I realize I'm not.
Anticipating...Snow and fires. Sledding. Nieces and nephews. Chocolate chip cookies and roast chicken. Frosted windowpanes.
Loving...Clean, tucked sheets. No responsibilities.
Missing...Cooking and raw vegetables.
Thinking...About what kind of job I can get when I get back to Leominster!
Wishing...My cough would go away and that I definitely didn't get tb at the Monlam A.K.A. a tb convention.
Hoping...Holiness gets better soon and I get to see him before I leave India!

More Backing Up...i.e. Bodhgaya

Dead mosquitoes carpeting the floor. Beggars with twisted limbs pulling themselves across the ground--a little girl whose body is missing below the belly button. Bhutanese, Tibetans, Ladakhis and Sikkhimese in their colorful clothes and scarves. Water bubbling for tea. Autorickshaw horns piercing the eardrum. Malas and gems and rocks and tiffinware. Teapots hung from a string. Ponies pulling carts of Indians-a rainbow of saris. Monks spilling out the sides of rickshaws packed so full. A ferris wheel--a Buddhist carnival. "Rickshaw madame?" "Where going Madame?" The policeman insisting on shooting the glowing blue toy into the sky. "Hello friend? Face mask?" A hugely pregnant goat. Dogs with udders. Tiny round felt hats.

Backing Up

During a Buddha's relics parade in Bodghaya.

More parade.

Bhutanese and ngakpa parade watchers.

The sagging mosquitoe net situation in our Bodhgaya room. The nets had holes all over that we unsuccesfully tried to patch with brown tape that repeatedly fell off. The room constantly had at least 30 mosquitoes--we counted.

A lovely wall in our Calcutta hotel.

In case you can't tell, a the bottom of these stairs is a family sleeping on the hotel lobby floor...

answers.....

so...yes we're at the monlam. yes, it is dusty and dirty and nasty. the mosquitoes and flies are rampant and everyone has a cough! also, HH is not well...although nobody seems to know exactly what's wrong--no one is allowed to see him--but he's expected to head back to namdroling in a few days. k and i are taking a train to calcutta tomorrow morning and then flying to bangalore the next day. oh, and monica, chung, peter, janet, johnny fu, anita and george lam and lama suchu have all been spotted in bodghaya...

More Calcutta

A bike coming down the road--dozens of white chickens hanging upside down off the handlebars. Men sit in closet-sized spaces high off the ground selling cigarettes, water and paan--banana leaves stacked, small metal pots lined up with tiny spoons, chopped betel nut. There are English magazines and books for sale on the sidewalks. When K and I step inside a hole-in-the-wall that sells pens and notebooks to use the STD phone, the owner is drinking tea from a thimble sized clay cup. When done, he throws it in the street where it smashes, asks if I want some. I say no thanks but he thinks I say yes. He calls into the street and a young boy comes over with a teakettle and two tiny cups. I say, "Oh, no thanks. It will keep me awake..." "But it's just tea!" the man exclaims, he seems disappointed and tells the boy to go away.